Change Is Coming For Gypsea Tails

Well you heard that famous saying “change is as good as a holiday!” & luckily for us we get both.

A big change is coming (soon) & we are heading up North in August for a month. Yay!

I assume most of you who are here know that we are currently not living in Margaret River right now. We are based on 28 acres of pure magic amongst the trees, in the middle of no where.

So as you can imagine is the dream, but comes with its big challenges. Back then, we thought we would be able to handle it all (the naive us). We really tried & in the quiet, not in a mad rush moments, we made the best memories we have ever created as a family. It has been a wonderous phase of life. Away from the judgement, the noise, the circles & egos… we healed.

We had marshmallow around the fire, Infront of a flowing dam, amongst the birds every single night kinda vibes. Drinking red wine, watching our kids happily making the most enchanting life long memories. We laughed, we cried, we forgave, we shared lots of firsts as a family & then I started to feel the heaviness of our big move.

Once I came to the realisation that living in our peaceful home wasn’t going to work long term, I started to withdraw.

It felt too hard to maintain it all.

Truthfully, back when we decided to make the move it was with the assumption that there was a school bus, it was closer than we thought (funny story which I may share one day), I would pick up lots of work around Nannup & not rely so much on my Margaret River clients & I thought even making a change for the kids school may be really great for them, but in time I realise I would this was all very selfish of me because I felt that I needed to move out of Margs for my healing to begin.

There is that saying “You cant heal in an environment that broke you”.

We came back from our 4 week road trip up North at the end of August 2023, with 100000000000 trillion photos & a truckload full of memories. I was at my happiest I have been in a very very long time on that trip. But when we got back I found myself slipping back into a dark place. There were constant reminders all around me of things i lost . People weren’t very kind to me around this time. Some people even shared my deepest secrets on public forums, community pages & dinner parties.

It was suffocating.

Ryan knew & could see how I was battling, for so long. He had started disliking our life too, feeling anger, frustration & the wrath of a small community. For months Ryan had been texting me through listings for houses around Margs. I always had an excuse for why they weren’t good enough. Too small, in an area I wouldn’t EVER buy in, its not down Kevill Road, there aren’t enough trees, Oh god its too close to the woman who verbally abused me at 8am on a school day morning, infront of my kids…

There was always an excuse why we couldn’t live here, but time was running out & we had to leave our rental because the owner wanted to renovate it slowly over time before selling.

& in the current rental crisis, a family of 4 with two big Dogs & a Pet business came with a bunch of RED FLAGS to real estates or home owners. Shit!

Then one very ordinary day Ryan a week or so after we knew we had a very short deadline to find ourselves a solution. Ryan sent me a link to a property in Nannup. All he wrote was “Just give this a chance, I think you need to go view it tomorrow with the kids.

We sat there on Face Time that night to one another with so much hope, excitedness & unknown possibilities was bouncing around during our conversation. I must admit it gave me the space to sit there fondly remembering most of my childhood, growing up on a game reserve with giraffes & zebra’s in your back yard.

The very next morning the kids, myself & 4 Dogs drove out to come view our potential new home. We spent the morning in Nannup & then drove out to the property, 15 minutes away. I remember driving through the trees, being so in awe of how beautiful it was, the whole area surrounded by national forest. It was so refreshing to be around this after 3 years in Margs & seeing forest after forest being destroyed to allow space for thousands of new identically built homes & schools to be built in this not precious tiny beach town that I had idolised for years before moving there.

I feel in love. I didn’t notice the cork flooring or the weird bathroom features or the old fashioned laundry room. I saw the house amongst the trees that I had seen before in a breathwork journey I had a year before. I saw potential to turn this space into a self contained retreat space & off grid living space in many years to come. But firstly I saw it as a safe place, away from the harshness of a place I once called home. And with my business in mind, I saw it as a place it could go from strength to strength.

That very same day we put a $10k deposit down. We were that certain this was home.

What followed was 30 very quick & stressful days of packing up a huge house, solo parenting, Ryan working longer swings to hep fund this, me taking on more work to help found this, wedding season kicking off again, plus other work commitments ..

I quickly re-turned to survival mode & I don’t think I have actually made my way out of it… Yet.

I can tell you that trying to run a business in survival mode whilst using all your weekly earnings on fuel, mechanic appointments, new tyres, lunches, kids hobbies isn’t fun. At first, very slowly but eventually you stop making time to open your laptop & update your website, or respond to an email, every simple task because a mountain.

I spoke in depth to only a handful of friends on how I was really feeling. It was a very isolating, dark & challenging time for me. For the kids & Ryan they were all happily plodding along, without a care in the world. Actually I think Deccy battled at the start quickly adjusted.

On so many levels I can see how I made the decision to move out here, it feels like home. Its peaceful, non-judgmental, safe, liberating & has the potential to be something amazing. But you need lots of time & lots of money & we have neither of those things.

I must admit it got to a point that I would cringe every time my phone rang or beeped with an email to ask me to look after their Dog. Everything felt like a HUGE effort. Nothing flowed easily & that is exactly how I described it to Ryan after a period of time, that’s all he heard for weeks at a time.

& then I stopped complaining. After countless conversations with real estate agents, friends, private rentals , rentals in other towns, the bank…

I fully accepted that this is where I was supposed to be, for whatever reason. I had to trust the process.

So I pulled back from more commitments in Margs, to certain circles that never truly made me feel heard or seen, to group chats that clearly excluded my kids or never listened to my advice. I made room for more time on the land, time as a family, off line, & surround myself with clients & their Dogs that bring me pure joy.

I started to look for the good, instead of the negative. I had so many epic friends, I have a healthy & happy family life, I get to hang around Dogs, even though this job won’t buy us a house down Kevill road, it allows me to be fully seen & respected.

Around this time I was also connected to an ex best friend. Long story short, she called after 1 year of silence after blocking me in rage. Sadly the only reason she called was because someone alerted her of a post I shared in a community page. I wont share the intimate details of this break up, this is definitely not the platform for it. But what I will say is I’m so glad she called. Because I finally got to hear her side, why she held so much resentment towards me, that she cant move forward etc . & it finally made me realise I was holding onto something that was never mine to keep, this whole thing was due to a serious of miscommunications & bad timing. & truthfully this person really wasn’t the person I thought she was. I wasted too many months crying over a person who never ever knew me. After a couple more text exchanges ( or as she would call them “essays”… ) I let go.

I feel only peace & fond memories when I think of this person & the thought of the loss of friendship no longer wobbles me.

EXHALE.

Then I opened my phone one Thursday morning recently & a lady had shared a quick post about her home being available to rent long term at the end of May. by this point I had lost all hope, accepted my decisions had lead me here & this was most likely going to be a no once I be fully transparent about my family (4 of us & 2 big Dogs) & a pet business.

But this woman listened, heard me, felt my situation & said “Its yours if you want it!”

I called Ryan….. We both just laughed… finally a break for us. He could’ve carried on for years, knowing Ryan he would just get on with it. But he knew I couldn’t.

& then we managed to find a beautiful soul who will be moving in to our home mid- June.

All the stars aligned.

So here we are now, 2 weeks before we make our way back into Margs. As wiser, more experienced souls who just travelled through a pretty intense season of life.

This journey has proven to me that I am stronger than I give myself credit for. It has shown me who my true friends are & who I no longer look to for inspiration or advice.

& mostly it has taught me that if I can run a business from the middle of no where, semi successfully (a few hiccups & lots of fuel trips later) but I kept a few regulars, had a very successful wedding season, lots of overnight care success stories & new followers with no advertising, just relying on word of mouth & my website… Then heck how amazing would I be if I had 12 more hours a week up my sleeve to build my business up better than before!

I have hope!

Stay tuned for our come back :)…